In Your Words: Releasing Guilt
IN YOUR WORDS: CARLIA CAPOZZA
This week's column is written by Carlia Capozza. Carlia is a TAFTA full-time alumni and former TAFTA Team member! Since graduating, Carlia has worked on an array of impressive productions, showcasing her variety and ability to work between all acting mediums: theatre, film, commercial, web-series and everything in between.
Releasing the guilt of feeling unproductive
Twiddling my thumbs. Struggling to motivate myself to exercise. Binge watching way too much Netflix. Eating that extra piece of chocolate. Some days, this is my life of self-isolation...and it is ok.
I’ve been talking to a lot of my actor friends and noticed that there’s this sense of guilt hanging over our heads if we’re not using this time to be creative. Everyone is talking about the advantages of being at home and having less to do. It means we have more time to be creative. And of course, who should be the most creative in these situations...the creatives!
What saddens me the most is that actors are feeling a sense of guilt for not creating content, or filming a monologue, or writing a script, or signing up to online acting courses. We are all on our own journey. There may be some people out there who are using this time to fill their creative side and I commend them for that. I wish for everyone to find the joy that being creative brings me. However, it does not mean our value decreases if we are not doing the same.
My life was go, go go. Between acting, creating content with friends, working a casual job, building and maintaining relationships, keeping up with my finances, flying back home to see family...it’s clear to say that I’m tired. I didn’t realise in the moment until I was forced to stop. And now that I have, I’ve accepted that it is ok to use this time to rejuvenate.
It is ok to have lazy days. It is ok to use your day to work on your mental health. It is ok to eat that little bit extra because you’re listening to what your body wants. It’s ok to spend quality time with your family or your roommates that maybe you haven’t had the opportunity to do in the past.
“The more I study acting, the more I realise the importance of simply living your life. The conversations you have with friends, the interactions you observe or take part in with people at the supermarket..these are not wasted moments. ”
No time is wasted. We do not have to be ‘creative’ every minute of every day. The more I study acting, the more I realise the importance of simply living your life. The conversations you have with friends, the interactions you observe or take part in with people at the supermarket..these are not wasted moments. These are building you as a person. The more you grow, the more you see, the more you experience...and the more you can use it in your acting.
So my advice to you is listen to your body. If you feel like you need a day (or week, or month) to focus on something other than acting, that is ok. One day, you’ll wake up and find the motivation you’ve been looking for. But don’t force it. When you are ready, you will be creative and productive. It is in our blood, there’s no way that we can’t. But for now, just take each moment as it comes. Listen and trust yourself. You are amazing!
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